Welcome to my blog! This first post will give a little background about my quest to quit smoking. I promise it will be short.
This is my fourth SERIOUS rodeo. There have been other times where I flirted with the idea and gave half baked attempts at quitting but this is the fourth and hopefully last time. I quit completely when I found out I was pregnant with my kids. Cold turkey. Cold turkey and hormones do not mix. I was successful though and made it all the way through the 9 months with both of them. The first time, after my daughter was born, Hurricane Andrew was knocking on our back door a week and a half after the day she was born. I believe my first words, as we were driving away in a car loaded with baby essentials and things "most important", was: "Give me a cigarette." Not "May I have a cigarette?" but, "GIVE me a cigarette." I smoked for 3 years till the stick turned blue again. Another 9 months passed with no smokes and then I started back again for no apparent reason except that I wanted one.
Fast forward 12 years to last year. A wonder drug came onto the market. I hemmed and hawed about trying it because it is so darn expensive but Chantix ain't no joke folks. I have been smoking since I was 14 years old, so I guess I am considered an old salt at it. The addiction is firmly rooted in my psyche and I crave it like a crack head craves crack. So, imagine my hesitant reaction to the claims that Chantix REALLY works. My doctor pointed out that I would spend less on Chantix in a month than I would on cigarettes so I took the plunge. In Dec. 2006 I began Chantix. Within one week I had totally quit smoking. Nada. Didn't even crave it and thought it was the nastiest smelling stuff I had ever smelled. I did wonderfully for 3 months and then THE trip arrived. My daughter was in the high school band and they had been accepted to march in the St. Patrick's Day Parade in Chicago. My husband and I were chaperones. Imagine this: Seventy two teenagers, about 22 adults (half of whom were acting like teenagers), two tour buses, 18 hours on said bus and NON STOP sight seeing for 3 days. And no Chantix. It began as small little tokes from my husbands cigarette. It then came to me begging him to find me some of MY cigarettes. He visited the lobby of the hotel and paid $10 (yes...that is TEN) for ONE pack of cigarettes. Now...we live in Alabama and our cigarettes are obviously not taxed as much as they are there and so he literally paid TRIPLE for those cigarettes. I swore I would smoke every single one of them and enjoy them fully and then NEVER smoke another one. Well...I didn't mention the 18 hour trip back from Chicago, so suffice it to say, I began smoking again.
NOW...here I am a year and a half later and I am ready to quit again. On Monday my sweet hubby and I started the Chantix again. You begin with a 0.5 mg pill for the first 3 days and then you take 0.5 mg twice a day through day 7. You then begin taking 1 mg and so on and so on. Thankfully it is easily marked and idiot proof.
So...what does it feel like, you ask? I haven't completely quit yet because our quit date is Monday but I'm really not missing it much. I have focused on the habits because, let's face it, the habit of smoking is the downfall of many. I like that first morning cigarette, I like the after shower smoke, I like the after I eat smoke and the after the lovin' smoke. (If my children are reading this...yes...your parents DO like lovin'! Get over it!) I have been setting a time limit of when I can smoke. Today and tomorrow is every two hours and then Sat. & Sunday is every 3 hours and more if I can swing it. (Twenty three minutes till the next one!) I am hoping that Monday I will be able to wake up and not crave one. I am hoping that the stress we are facing on Wed. will not be a downfall. I am also realistic because I know that even if I do slip up, even if I don't quit completely on Monday, the Chantix will be there to back me up and fight the cravings and the withdrawls.
So now...after letting the dogs out and checking the cleanliness of the 13 year olds room and under his bed, I am sitting back here with 16 minutes left till the next one.
I guess the cravings are still there.
I'm sure tomorrow will be better.
